Quote from here.
In a relationship we cannot control the way our partner is nor can we change him into what we want him to be. On the contrary, fighting the differences will make them stronger and by trying to change somebody we will make them want to resist even more. The only thing we can do is accept our partner for who he is, without conditions!Other things we can do:
- Love yourself ~ Some people are in relationships because they are afraid to be alone. If you can’t love yourself, you can’t possibly love somebody else. Be courageous and get to know yourself. You are the most amazing being on this planet. Start accepting yourself for who you are, for your strengths and for your weaknesses. You are after all your very own best friend!
- Accept the differences ~ This is easier said than done. We assume other people are like us and get flustered when they are not. Accept that we are different. He does not like to talk in the morning? Don’t talk to him in the morning. He does not want to watch the same movies? Find someone who does. Only if we accept our differences can we create the space to understand each other.
- Be interested ~ Curiosity is an amazing thing and kids have it in spades. Wow, who is this person that can give us such joy and such heartache? What does he like, what are his dreams, how can we get closer to him? If you can stay curious, if you don’t already know who the other person is, life will become magical.
- Be honest ~ Being honest is not as easy as it may seem. First, be honest with yourself. What do you really want? Stop acting nice, don’t pretend to be someone you are not. We can’t very well appreciate one another if we are playing games of deception. You don’t have to put on an act to get what you want, just ask for it.
- Keep learning ~ Unfortunately, we don’t learn how to have a great relationship in school, or growing up. Do your homework. Take a seminar, get a coach, read and learn online or in books. There is some great information out there that can really help you in making sense out of it all. I am listing a few books below that have really helped me and I hope they are valuable for you as well.
