Sometimes I just miss those times that I could even say a something without upsetting you or even by making you angry. *sigh*
Sometimes I feel that I'm the useless one that does not know how to appreciate things around me. Sometimes I feel that your friends are more important than myself.
Sometimes you make me feel that my feelings are not important at all anymore. How do I keep my feelings in a box?
When I feel like talking to you about how I feel, you just turn a deaf ear, push me away as in silence or just get mad at me for feeling that way. Is it wrong to tell you how how I feel?
Every time I feel down, you make me think that is it my fault that I choose to feel that way. I feel that you don't tend yo direct my thoughts and just let me go on thinking on the negative thoughts.
Sometimes you make me feel that I regret telling you how I feel.
When I start tearing , you tend not to wipe it dry and ask me 'Why?' but instead you just let me go on crying.
Shouldn't you be the one drying my tears up?
Shouldn't you be the one to cheer me up?
At the end of the day, these are just thoughts running through my mind. Thoughts that is suppose to be erase but can't seem to forget. Aren't we suppose to share, listen and give each other support or courage? Right now, I'm don't know which one though.
But still, at the end of the day, I still love you so much that I can't just give up on you. Is it worth it? I don't know. No matter how hurtful the words you use against me, I just find it so hard just to hate you. Sometimes I think about all the words you used, is it because you want to push me away from your life or just to teach me a lesson? I hope it does not mean anything or the first one that came up to my mind. If it is a lesson, I'm sure that this is the hardest way to learn.
*Sigh*

hey hey hey.. I'm back!!!
Astrid has been bugging me to update my blog... :P
and I'm just plain lazy to do so! hehehe...

October is over and now its November!!! wow! next will be December! how the year ends so fast!
Oh-my... looking back and think, I'm not pretty sure whether I have achieve anything besides graduating from MMU... hehehehe... That's why I never believed in 'NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION!'

Since then... I just decided to live my life as it is...

It's already November and I haven't found a job yet! Hopefully soon!! Keeping my fingers crossed!!! *Praying hard* I just send out my portfolio for viewing by one of the company in Bangsar and I'm hoping that I get a good respond! Need to start work immediately though as I'm running out of cash! I've finally updated my portfolio site... and it's here...

This pass few days, boyfriend, Astrid and me have been going to Jaya One... Kinda our new spot of 'lepaking' but in a sense that we are not drinking 'teh-o-ais' or 'teh-o suam'... Well Hoegaarden is the new Bestfriend for Astrid... hahahaha... Kevin came back for a day!!! So we all decided to have a drink there tooo..... *Curtosy of Astrid*

Yesterday Gerard got tickets for us for the Quantum of Solace's movie premier... Yeah it's out... but... I kinda feel disappointed with the whole movie... The first scene with the cars and the way he drives was awesome... but later in the movie there wasn't much 'cool' weapons used and mostly was using those little hand guns and hands! BUT... I just wanna say 'thank you Gerard!'

The last I posted up about my dream.... This time I had a dream again!! This time I was sent to JAIL!!! For what ever reason I have no clue though... *Extremelly weird*

Besides that... I have been hooked on with my complilation of series!!! I'm enjoying it!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeee.....

Tomorrow I might come up with the list of things I intend to do in the final of the year 2008 before it is 2009!! hehehe... *still thinking though*